All posts by Yasmine

About Yasmine

I like orange sunshine and blue slurpees.

You gotta let me make my choice alone before my food gets cold

Hi, I like taking pictures of my food
Eliza’s, at California & Divisadero in San Francisco, originally uploaded by yaznotjaz.

This is just to let you know I’m alive and well and constantly complaining to friends who apprehensively fear for my safety – not to mention my soul – about this winter weather business. (My favorite whine of the week: “Winter is stupid. What was God thinking?”) Shut up, I know I live in California, but it’s freakin’ cold ’round here, take my word for it.

All I’ve been doing these last few weeks is eating, sleeping, lying on my couch watching Season One of Grey’s Anatomy (I am so behind the times; they’re actually on Season Three now, apparently), and making plans left and right to hang out with friends who support me in my predictably last-minute whims involving get-togethers and food sessions.

Speaking of food: A couple of days ago, having skipped breakfast (I can just see 2Scoops, my self-appointed Nutritionist Extraordinaire, shaking his head over there in sunny San Diego), I continually whined to B while at work about how hungry I was. Lunchtime came and went, and I hadn’t even left my desk to go and eat. I think we’ve all realized by now that my eating habits while at work are disgraceful, to say the least, but even I’ve got to admit that there are days when I need what the rest of the world calls real food. Even the thought of the mint chocolate chip cookies and snickerdoodles, which I brought in the day before and which were now sitting abandoned in the workplace kitchen, just wasn’t doing it for me.

Finally, at 3.45pm, I pushed my chair away from the desk, announced, “I’m going to go find some food!” and walked out to my car. While pulling away from the curb, I called the closeby Desi [South Asian] restaurant. “Hi, I’d like to order two samosas and a naan, to go.”

I could swear I heard a muffled laugh from the guy at the other end of the line. “Is that all?”

“Yes, that’s it. About how long will it take for the food to be ready?”

“Less than fifteen minutes. What’s the name?”

“Yasmine.”

When I walked into the restaurant ten minutes later, a guy called out, “Are you Yasmine?”

“Yes.”

“I’m sorry, we only had enough vegetables left for one samosa,” he said apologetically,

“Oh.” I stood stock-still, thinking, “One samosa and one naan? Geez, what the hell kind of real meal is THAT? The one day I even bother.”

Out loud, I said, “One samosa is fine. I do get a naan, though, right?”

The guy smiled. “Yes, the naan is all ready.”

I swear I go to this place just for the naan. I had barely settled back into my car before I tore into the bread, freshly-baked and piping-hot. Curiously, I opened the styrofoam container containing the other half of my order. Inside were two samosas. TWO.

I let out a confused, “What the hell?” before I realized that “one samosa” means one order, which actually means two samosas. Suitably enlightened, I closed the container and continued munching on the naan. I had already eaten more than half of it by the time I got back to the office, where B greeted me with, “It’s past 4. I can’t believe you’re eating lunch now, when we’re leaving at 5.30 anyway.”

Good lookin’ out, because by the time I met the lovely rehes for dinner at 7pm, I was still far too full to properly enjoy our Desi/Thai meal. Anyone who can give me good Thai food recommendations is a rockstar in my book (I am extremely wary about Thai food; what I’ve grown up eating as savory food – i.e. vegetables, etc. – should not taste sugary sweet, as far as I’m concerned). rehes and I need to hang out more regularly. I trust her recommendations.

By the way, did you know that Desi restaurants have spiffy-looking websites now? Man, we’re coming on up in the world these days. Never mind the fact that any Desi restaurant describing its food as “seductive and enticing” makes me giggle.

Links to love on this online webbed world

San Francisco 70
My buddy S and I stand still for a moment during our hanging-out session with Anjum, early this year. Originally uploaded by yaznotjaz.

I keep bookmarking websites and then not doing anything with them, so perhaps I should share them with you all. Here are some stops I’ve made on the internet lately [apologies for not giving credit where it’s due; I always forget how I initially came across such links]:

Hamza’s photographs on flickr [He messaged me to say he enjoyed my Zaytuna photos, which is how I found his photos in turn.]
– Archived photos on the Muslim Cultures weblog
The Olive Ream‘s photos at Over a Mile

Google Reader, you make my weblog-surfing so much more efficient!
The Bravia paint ad: So many colors! ROCKING.
– Beautiful poetry by Murtaza Danish [Check Coffee in Times of War]

Seeing the downside of ’cause celebs’
– For my fellow bookworms: Librarian Avengers [Their weblog description on ReviewMe.com says: Librarians need a blog to avenge their low pay and appalling working conditions. This is that blog. With jokes.]
– flickr photoset: The Vicissitudes of Moi, Moi, Moi

– Reading up on Tin-Tin (“billions of bilious blue blistering barnacles!”)
Juan Mann and his “free hugs” campaign
– “We are here”: Mission schoolkids urge grownups to set a good example

Where the hell is Matt?
I’m Hip, I’m With it! – How To Talk Like Sumana Harihareswara

Rock, Paper, Scissors: Reffing the RPS state championship is no job for the nervous
Four Steps to a More Meaningful, Less Commercialized Holiday — with Kids [No, I don’t have kids of my own, in case any of you were confused about that]

– One of the most talented people I don’t know, though I’ve seen videos of her performances, years ago while in college: Anna Deavere Smith (1, 2, 3)
[Check out Twilight: Los Angeles, 1992 the play in book format, as well as the film.]

* Some weblog posts I’ve especially loved reading lately:
– Brimful – most of all, when snowflakes fall and inarticulate speech of the heart
– One Female Canuck – Rules for Life
– HijabMan – Bio Data Construction For Dummies (Men’s edition)
– BrooklynBrown – What You Should Do When There Is A Death In Your Friend’s Family
– And my favorite: Chai’s post entitled Magical Nights, Magical Connections. In all the weeks (months) I attended the Wednesday evening meditations, I was never able to articulate the beauty of it through writing as Chai managed to do so well after the single evening she attended with me last week.

All we are is all so far: Highfive to God, and a poem by Hafiz about how God always has the last laugh

A chessboard awaits potential players in an Oakland park
A chessboard awaits potential players in an Oakland park, originally uploaded by yaznotjaz.

“Are you happy, Yasminay?” asked HijabMan the other day through GMail chat [apparently the best/only way to get ahold of me these days – since I suck at returning people’s phone calls and replying to their emails and I can’t be bothered to sign onto instant messenger anymore – even though my GMail status is perpetually set on the red “busy” symbol; shhh, it’s a lie].

“I’m always happy,” I replied blithely. “What’ve I got to complain about?” And it’s the truth. [Never mind the fact that friends calling me “Yasminay” would already be pretty high up there in terms of warm, fuzzy, happiness-inducing stuff, if there were a hierarchy of happiness.] I have a couple of thanks+giving related posts marinating in my mind, and there’s a someday-forthcoming post on happiness that I wrote years ago and never shared. But meanwhile, yes, I’m happy, and there are days when I glance around and all I want to do is give God a big ol’ highfive.

I think I already have quite a nice track record of blasphemy, so highfives to God shouldn’t disconcert all y’all too much. Anyway, there are days when I’m driving along and the sunshine slants through my windows onto my face just so and my hands on the steering wheel feel warm and I’m wearing my favorite pair of flared jeans and the music is rockingloud and the sunroof is open and I’m going to go meet friends who make me laugh until my stomach hurts, and life is just simply, perfectly good. And I think, “God, You are the rockingest rockstar ever.”

God of rock, indeed. I dream that someday when I finally meet Him face-to-Face, He will smile to hear that I always knew He had a sense of humor.

Driving back to the office from a meeting a couple of weeks ago, two songs playing in rapid succession reminded me of the psychopathic maniac/nerd child SS, which in turn reminded me of our mutual buddy, Mark, and the fact that I needed to email both of them. It had been far too long.

Back at the office, I turned on my computer and logged into my personal email. And there, at the very top of my inbox, was an email from Mark with the subject line stating simply, “Hafiz.” How could I not laugh? God, He reads my mind so well.

Here is the beautiful poem by Hafiz, sent by Mark-of-the-multiple-exclamation-points:


Chessboard (ii)
Originally uploaded by yaznotjaz.

What is the difference
Between your experience of Existence
And that of a saint?
The saint knows
That the spiritual path
Is a sublime chess game with God
And that the Beloved
Has just made such a Fantastic Move
That the saint is now continually
Tripping over Joy
And bursting out in Laughter
And saying, “I Surrender!”
Whereas, my dear,
I am afraid you still think
You have a thousand serious moves.

Because I know you like voting and weblogs and voting for weblogs

Pencil in that patriotic profundity
Pencil in that patriotic profundity, originally uploaded by yaznotjaz.

I forgot to share with you all a rocking weblog I came across during Ramadan: MUSLIM FOR A MONTH.

And – hey look, kids, you were supposed to be nominating submissions for the annual Brass Crescent awards! The deadline is Friday, November 17, 2006 (yes, tomorrow). Obviously, if there’s anything I’ve taught you in nearly four years, it’s how to be a procrastinator extraordinaire.

The categories are:

– Best Blog
– Best Non-Muslim Blog
– Best Design
– Best Post or Series
– Best Ijtihad
– Best Female Blog
– Best Thinker
– Most Deserving of Wider Recognition
– Best Group Blog
– Best Middle-East/Asian Blogger

Check out Brass Crescent for a detailed explanation of each of the categories. You don’t have to be Muslim in order to vote, it seems. altmuslim and City of Brass are ineligible for nomination. However:

With the exceptions noted on this site, any blog is eligible for any category, including blogs authored by non-muslims. In defining the Islamsphere, we are not relying solely on adherence to the faith, but an affinity for parts of the diverse cultural fabric that Islam embraces and is embraced by worldwide. [link]

Get to it. To quote flickr, it’s just like the electoral experience, minus the cool stickers. (Speaking of stickers, they gave me four “I Voted” stickers on November 7th. FOUR. Clearly, I’m a rockstar about voting.)

Sometimes I get the feeling that I’m standing in the wrong line

Having ordered and paid for a caramel pecan cream pie at Baker’s Square last week, I was idly checking out the tattoos on the young man named Brian who was boxing up and bagging my purchase. Suddenly, Brian glanced at me across the counter and asked, “Do you know what sundar means?”

“Sorry, what was that?”

Sundar. Do you know what it means?”

“It sounds familiar, but I really have no idea. What language is that?”

“It’s Hindi,” he said.

“Oh, well – “

” – I was going to impress you with my Hindi,” he added, smiling. “But I guess it’s not working.”

“I guess not,” I said, smiling back. “I don’t speak Hindi.”

“But your English is great,” he said magnanimously, handing me the bagged pie across the counter. “You don’t even have an accent or anything.”

“Well, I would hope not,” I said, a little annoyed but still smiling politely. “I was born in California.”

“Yeah, it’s perfect.”

“American born and bred, what can I say,” I replied wryly, turning to leave. “Have a beautiful day.”

Later, while cutting the pie in Somayya’s kitchen, I asked, “Hey, what does sundar mean? The dude at Bakers Square was asking me, but I had no idea.”

“I think it means ‘beautiful.’ He was totally hitting on you, Yazzo.”

“You think everyone’s hitting on me. You needa stop with that business.”

“You’re just oblivious all the damn time. And I think sundar really does mean ‘beautiful.’ “

“What a stupid boy, then,” I said derisively. “Telling me how great my English skills are, is not the way to impress me.”

Seriously, people, get with the program. Also, for the Hindi-speaking Blogistanis: what DOES sundar mean?

As an aside, a few of my friends have been teasing me lately about how my “gorgeously drama-free life” was shaken up recently for a day or so. Everyone who knows me knows how much I love my lack of drama, and those few whom I’d confided in took great pleasure in gleefully throwing my drama-free mantra back in my face. Over the phone the other morning, I was updating Somayya on the situation, and explaining why I wasn’t going to take advantage of this opportunity, why I didn’t think it was right for me, and all the off-the-top-of-my-head reasons why it just wouldn’t work.

Somayya overrode my objections with an evisceratingly sharp retort: “Oh, shut up, Yazzo. Just shut UP.”

“I’m just sayin’,” I said lamely.

From the other end of the line came the impatiently blunt, cuttingly clear voice of the one person who knows me best: “All you’re saying is a bunch of BULLSHIT.”

See? I love this kid.

Three things: The Halloween in GMail-chat edition

Colorful mobiles
Originally uploaded by yaznotjaz.

I first got an inkling that Halloween this year was going to generate funny conversations when my buddy Z IMed me at the beginning of October with, “I’m gonna go as Ahmedinejad for Halloween.” Seriously, I didn’t even have a comeback to compete with that. In true Yasmine fashion, I believe my response was laughter and resounding approval: “ROCKING.”

The evening of Halloween, I got home from work at 8pm with a pounding headache, crawled onto the sofa with my favorite psychedelic-colored comfort blanket, and watched Dancing with the Stars and Boston Legal while eating Chinese leftovers from dinner with T and B the evening before. In between exchanging text messages with T – who was trying to convince me to 1. invest in orange flares and 2. visit the East Coast – I kept an attentive ear out for trick-or-treaters stopping by. (Un)fortunately, only about half a dozen kids showed up in total – since Casa420 [my home] is located on a narrow, winding, “scary” street, as I had been explaining to Z earlier in the day – which meant I ended up with lots of leftover Halloween candy. I’m not complaining. As the following conversations show, I’m a huge fan of free candy – and so are my friends, it seems.

GMail conversation with A, mid-October:

yasmine: i like halloween
yasmine: well, i like candy, so i jump at any chance to get free candy
A: same here
A: I once got into an argument with someone that Halloween is haram [forbidden/prohibited]
A: it was quite amusing
A: I don’t think they got the commercial aspect of free candy
yasmine: “HALLOVEEEN IS…BID’AH [religious innovation]!”
A: hahahaha
A: I was like, “you can make it halal [permissible]”
A: can dress up as your favourite Imam, that type of thing
A: “I’m Bukhari! I’m Bukhari!”
yasmine: that’s freakin’ hilarious
yasmine: i want to be al-ghazali, in that case
yasmine: al-ghazali was a ROCKSTAR
yasmine: mashaAllah
A: hahahahaha
A: yeah, I’m an idiot
A: needless to say, haven’t spoken to that person again
A: they started telling me about how it’s all so paganistic
yasmine: oh yeah, i bet
yasmine: they probably think you’re all haraam now
yasmine: vat a BLASPHEMER!
A: and then I told them about the days of the week in the Julian calendar
A: and how they’re based on pagan gods

A’s GMail status on October 31st: “Halloween mubarak!”

yasmine: so, are you dressed as your favorite imam?
A: no, not at all
A: I kinda went the other route!
yasmine: hahaha and what would that be?
A: I dressed up as a devil
yasmine: what’re you wearing, exactly?
A: well, got the hair-band thing with the devil horns that light up
A: and then got a mini-trident that lights up
A: wore all black clothes
yasmine: oh dude, you’re rocking it up, aren’t you
A: and came into work, made a sign in MS Word
A: using the word art font
A: that said “Prada”
A: taped it on my back
yasmine: i am silently laughing so hard at work right now
A: and I became “The Devil Wears Prada” :)
yasmine: you are so freakin’ hilarious
A: hahaha
A: I’m just an idiot
yasmine: to steal a line from my buddy hijabman: “HIGHFIVE!”
A: I thought this up last night at the dollar store
A: Oopar paanch! :)

And, of course, the incomparable Z, who started it all:

Z at 4.30pm: Attention: the secretaries have chocolate and lots of it
Z: they are sitting behind it right now
Z: but they leave in precisely T minus half an hour
Z: this is when we strike

Z at 5.05pm: READY YOUR MEN
Z: ATTAAAAAAACK
yasmine: mygod, you’re on crack
yasmine: CANDY CRACK!
Z: we had to retreat, the guard hadn’t retired yet
Z: which is weird, they’re usually gone by 5
Z: but we’re gearing up for another pass
Z: and man, is it gonna be glorious
Z: see? i can have fun at work without you
Z: it just takes a little imagination
yasmine: i hate you. stop having fun without me, dammit

Z at 5.43pm: carla took the candy
Z: stupid carla

>CONTINUE READING

Akhtar de mubarak sha!

Akhtar de mubarak sha!

Eid mubarak, crackstars! Can you believe it’s over? Yeah, me either. Have a beautiful day, lovely people – may it be a blessed time for you and yours.

(PS: I don’t even get a real Eid – seminar all day Monday, projects on Tuesday, regardless of whatever day I would have chosen to celebrate. The good news: I’m taking Friday off to attend jummah at my favorite masjid [Oakland] and bum around in Berkeley and perhaps San Francisco as well. The promise of jummah in Oakland, after months away, is enough to make my week. Rocking good times.)

Three Things (plus three more)

Sunlight shadows on the sidewalk, Friday afternoon
Sunlight shadows on the sidewalk, Friday afternoon, originally uploaded by yaznotjaz.

This afternoon, after clicking over to Blogger.com and pausing before signing in (believe it or not, this is something I do often: I decide I want to update this weblog, I click over to Blogger, and then I just stop, overcome by a feeling of overwhelming helplessness: Where do I even begin? – too many stories to share, and, clearly, I think too much and thus end up writing and sharing nothing)…so, anyway, in the few moments today as my fingers hovered restlessly over the mouse and I debated yet again whether or not to sign into Blogger, I discovered my new favorite weblog: it’s one in the list of current Blogs of Note, and entitled Three Beautiful Things. Someone named Spitfire left a lovely comment there that summed up the entire premise of the Three Beautiful Things weblog:

The natural, simple happiness of the commonplace things is subtle and beautiful, and yet it requires a well-trained eye to appreciate it.
Those who find in the small details the true reason for being alive are to be praised. The search for sources of authentic smiles is a difficult, but noble and delightful activity.

And as Clare herself of Three Beautiful Things notes:

The thing about 3BT is, it’s not that my life is particularly beautiful (although I know as a single woman living in England in 2007, I have a lot to be thankful for) but that I find myself constantly on the look-out for beautiful things.

Leaving work at 5.30pm today, I swung the front door shut behind me, and something about the late afternoon light made me stop dead in my tracks. Seconds later, my bag hit the ground and I was kneeling on the walkway, camera in hand, snapping photos of the sunlight on the grass. When I’d decided a dozen photos was more than enough, I stood up, brushed off my knees, and, before turning away to head back to my car, I stopped and aimed one final, level glance at the shadows, thinking, I have to remember this moment so I can write about it later.

So, because I am nothing if not a proponent of celebrating the mundane (and a lover of the word beautiful), I’ve decided I’m going to try this three beautiful things exercise myself, in order to get myself back into the swing of writing regularly. Perhaps (I’m pretty sure) I’ll end up recording more than three things at a time, but the point – for me – is to just write. Simple, seemingly mundane things would be a good start, because in the last few months I’ve become so overwhelmed by what I haven’t written that it’s been difficult to get myself out of this blogging backlog and actually write.

I’m aiming to try this everyday. Ambitious, I know, but I’ve got to start somewhere. And because I’ve missed Blogistan comment-box conversations with my fellow bloggers and blurkers [blog+lurkers] so much, you are more than welcome to add your own three-things to the comments.

So, here’s my Friday: Things that made me smile, in numerical form. One, two, three, GO.

1. The way the late afternoon sunlight and shadows slant across the sidewalk. [See photo above. It took me far too long to decide which photo to post; they’re all so sunshine-y beautiful and make me especially happy because this past week has been all about the rain.]

2. Organizing a conference call for work – and having it go off without a hitch – and crossing everything off Page One of my four-page project plan. (I love the strikethrough function! Pages 2-4 must be completed during this upcoming week, though. Gross.)

3. GMail chat conversation with HijabMan about how he’s planning on flying notes around his office. The mental image made me laugh, and what’s even funnier is that I can imagine my co-worker/buddy B and I doing the same.

4. Phone conversations spent remembering karaoke with old co-workers, back in the good ol’ downtown Sacramento days.

5. Accolades –
HijabMan: “Wow, how did you get so lucky…? Dude, you are so a rockstar.”
Yasmine: “Because they love me!”
HijabMan: “I’ve never heard you say something so…self-centered.”

6. Quick GMail chat conversation with the buddy Z about how, as children, we used to light things on fire, which inexplicably ends with him exclaiming, “You, sire, are a DILETTANTE.”

Can I get your hand to write on

Year-round shoes of choice
Year-round shoes of choice, originally uploaded by yaznotjaz.

A couple of weeks ago, I went out to dinner with the very few friends from high school whom I like enough to engage in such activities with. Remind me to tell you stories about why I disliked high school, and why my fifth-year reunion last December was a ludicrous waste of time.

At the end of our dinner, as we stepped outside the restaurant and began saying our goodbyes before heading in our individual directions, the topic of shoes somehow came up in conversation. I, of course, had to add my two cents to this discussion, so I remarked that I can’t stand to wear real shoes, even during winter.

N looked down at the requisite flip-flops on my feet, and said understandingly, “Yeah, but, see, it’s part of your culture.”

I wonder if my face betrayed the disgust I felt. A lifetime spent combating ignorance and explaining who I am and why I do the things I do, and yet it still came down to such inane observations from people I thought knew me. “My culture? You think I wear flip-flops because of my culture?”

“Well, yeah, don’t you?”

I laughed, because the whole exchange was so ridiculous I couldn’t even believe I was making this clarification: “Buddy, I wear flip-flops because my feet feel freakin’ claustrophobic in real shoes, alright?”

“Oh.”

I came home and shook my head a few more times over the absurdity. The next day, after a morning spent shaking off nagging feelings of deja vu, I remembered bits of a poem I had written last year, and the part that comes back to haunt me is this:

Someday,
You will stop laughing at me
For wearing flip-flops almost
Year-round
When you understand that
My ancestors wore sandals
Across all seasons
Because they couldn’t afford real shoes to cover
Their brown feet
As they toiled in the fields.

And you will nod in understanding and slip off
Your name-brand
Logo’d sneakers
And we’ll sit on a sunny plot of grass,
Barefoot together,
Squinting at the sky.

Well. Never let it be said that long-lost high school friends don’t know me. But just to clarify, I really wear flip-flops only because of the claustrophobia reason mentioned above.

One thing to add: Much love and gratitude and sunshine to Fathima and Ruqayyah for their beautiful emails. I will reply, but, meanwhile, thank you both for taking the time to check in – and, of course, thank you to everyone else who’s harassed me via the tagboard and comment box, too. I’m here, I’m alive, I’ve missed Blogistan. I told blurker N, who caught me on AIM the other afternoon, that you’d all stab me if you knew the number of half-written weblog entries that I’ve let sit on my computer instead of posting them as I should have been the last couple of months. So, stay tuned for stories about why I enjoy my job, about my first time at the recent ISNA convention in Chicago (and the rockstars I met!), and for musings on Lebanon and September 11th (I do nothing if not write on topics much too late, clearly).

Did I mention I missed you all? I really did, dammit, contrary to what you may think of my periodic, flaky-flake habit of abandoning you without explanation. The next round of cranberry juice is on me. Here’s to sunshine in September, rockstars.

The Soul Behind the Music: Enlightened, but still Outlandish

The Danish group Outlandish is one of my favorite music bands, so I was delighted to recently find in my inbox a Divanee Magazine interview with Waqas Qadri. Qadri is ethnically Pakistani; the other two band members are ethnically Moroccan and Cuban/Honduran.

From the Outlandish website:

We live in times when political positions are becoming polarized and cultures are considered fenced-in entities that cannot be united. The world is often viewed through a faulty prism that divides “us” from “them.” That’s why it is such a tension-breaker when someone takes the time and uses their talent to remind us that we are all human beings. That the blood running through your veins is not significantly different from the blood that flows through your neighbor’s body, even though you may not share the same social status, political views, religious conviction or hail from the same latitude or longitude. This is where Outlandish enters the picture.

The story of Outlandish is an uplifting tale about three friends’ common adventure, which starts in the youth clubs and soccer fields of the western Copenhagen suburbs… At the same time, Outlandish is the story of a band that insists on the vantage point called “the world we live in,” and through subjective, grass-root musical narratives, tries make a difference.

In my favorite part of the Divanee interview, Qadri says:

The other artists would take a break beat and sample from Marvin Gaye or old jazz . The samples often came from records their parents used to listen to. So I went home and went through my parents’ record collection and I couldn’t find Marvin Gaye and other artists like that. All I could find was Mehdi Hassan or Lata Mangeshkar. I talked to Isam and Lenny, and Isam found some Arabic and Lenny had de Mercedes Sosa. So we said, ‘What the heck, let’s try this’ and decided to put it all together. We picked up a record and took it to the studio. The producer was like, ‘What the hell are you doing? You can’t mix hip hop with Asian music. Or Latin music. That won’t work; bring me some Stevie Wonder or something like that.’